May E-Press

Happy Springtime to all! We are pleased to provide you all with our May E-press, that includes information about promoting responsibility in children, several protective factor handouts for parents and children about healthy eating, parental stress, and more! We have also included that second part of our newest Supervised Visitation Training Manual Chapter entitled, “Train-the-Trainer.”

We hope that you will pass the information along. May E-Press


Clearinghouse on Supervised Visitation
The Institute for Family Violence Studies
Florida State University

q: I have a parent who I’m trying to teach about the Serve and Return response. I explain the concept, but she doesn’t really understand me. We are both frustrated. What can I do?
Thank you for asking. If every child welfare and SV program taught the serve and return response, our communities would be a better place!
I recommend that you show her the Still Face Experiments on You Tube. Sometimes showing is better than explaining. Here’s the URL.

Q: Should we use the Protective Factors with family court cases, too, or only dependency cases?
I believe that every family can use a little help. After all, only a small percentage of families ever get referred to supervised visitation, so you are dealing with cases in which a judge has determined that one or more members of the family needs help. The Protective Factors approach is adaptable to every family who walks through your doors, but that does not mean that every family is the same. The best way to maximize the benefits to families is to look at them as unique. Crafting a plan to focus on specific needs of the family involves thinking about and analyzing the family: what are their challenges? What are their strengths? How can this time at supervised visitation add to the strength of the family? I realize that what we’ve proposed is that programs spend extra time thinking about how to help each unique case. But I also firmly believe that the effort is worth it. One of my favorite quotes is that “No effort on behalf of children is wasted.”

Q: The trauma that our families have experienced is really overwhelming. My staff get very tired and sad. How can I help them?

It’s called compassion fatigue, burnout, and secondary traumatization. I would guess that every single person who has worked with vulnerable, traumatized clients has experienced it. Still, the Clearinghouse has been offering ways to think about healing, too. Maybe it sounds difficult, but try to reframe your efforts as working toward resilience. When families are about to enter your program, remind staff that you will now have another chance to make a positive difference in the lives of your clients. Remind staff that joy is still possible for these families. And remind staff to take care of themselves. We have had several trainings on self care. Have you seen them? If not, write to me and I will send them to you. You and your staff deserve to be healthy, just like the families you serve.
Promoting Responsibility in Children
By Shannon Case
Responsibility is an umbrella term that encompasses many critical skills vital to ensuring healthy childhood development. It is also a major key in being able to navigate and succeed throughout life that goes way beyond early childhood life. To be “responsible” is to be dependable, accountable, able to meet and honor commitments, and acknowledge your mistakes and shortcomings, which serve to mold a more moral and independent individual able to make greater contributions to one’s family, community, and society. When kids are expected and exposed to behaving independently from a young age, they will be better prepared to conquer their day to day life as adults.


This E-press will address and inform social service providers about:
• Building and encouraging responsibility in children
Promoting and encouraging responsibility

1. Define responsibility in a way that is easy for children to recognize and understand.

Children cannot act on and behave in a way that they do not understand, so it is important to explain in terms they can understand, what responsibility means. Responsibilities are commitments and promises- the things you said you would do, the things you have to do, the people depending on you, the deadlines you have to make, etc. For children, responsibilities may include, picking up their toys after they use them, doing school work assignments, or making sure their bed is made every morning.

2. Lead by example.

It’s easy to say but even harder to do. Kids learn from the actions of the adults and caregivers surrounding them. For a child to be expected to clean up after themselves, take responsibility for their actions, and behave morally and responsibly, they must be exposed to this kind of behavior and from a young age. Set a good example for them and teach them age-appropriate tasks that they can practice and demonstrate what they have learned.
3. Change undesirable behavior while reinforcing desired independent and responsible behavior.

It is often easier and more commonplace to overlook what a child is doing right and solely focus on what the child is doing wrong, resulting in children receiving far more negative attention than they do positive. Research shows that reinforcing positive behavior in children is both rewarding and helps set guidelines for the child about what they should and should not do in future situations, thereby instilling a moral and behavioral compass.

The reinforcement and rewards can be simple verbal praises, such as:

• “I love the way you made your bed this morning!”
• “When you picked up your toys today without being told, it showed me how nice and helpful you are.”
• “Thank you for being so considerate and responsible.”

Positive reinforcement such as this teaches children that their efforts are important and appreciated, which also helps build their self-esteem and self-worth!

4. Know what to expect and don’t demand too much.

Most children lose their desire to contribute to housework and responsibilities as they get older. While teaching and enforcing responsibility, it is important to be mindful of the fact that children shouldn’t dread housework or responsibility. There should be no negative connotation associated with responsibility; they shouldn’t feel forced into doing something out of fear of repercussions. Be sure the tasks and chores asked of children are age appropriate and manageable- a toddler is typically not going to be able to wash and fold a load of laundry but they should be able to place and sort their dirty clothes in the proper hamper instead of leaving them lying around carelessly. Also, try not to be alarmed if a red sock ends up in the whites. Instead, use it as a learning opportunity to reinforce the proper way to sort clothes.
The goal should always be shaping a child who takes pleasure in contributing and taking responsibility. Be slow to criticize and reprimand, instead provide encouragement and support for good effort. Instead of doing the work for them or scolding them, provide clear and easy to understand feedback to the child so they can correct their mistakes on their own the next time.
5. Accountability

The discord between teaching children how to behave responsibly, and them actually exhibiting and practicing responsible habits, lies in the fact that they have no understanding of accountability and consequences. The consequences should not be too harsh, but they should not be too lenient either. They should however make a big enough impact on the child to deter them from receiving the same punishment again in the future.

Having good moral citizens; the people ruling our nation, teaching our kids, and upholding justice and order, is the result of a childhood upbringing where responsibility and accountability are instilled at a young age. Studies show that when children are shown and taught responsible behavior, they are more likely to succeed in school, form meaningful relationships with peers, be more independent, and have a higher sense of self-worth and esteem. These are the children that we should aim to raise!
Center for Parenting Education. “Teaching Responsibility to Children.” The Center for
Parenting Education. N.p., n.d. Web. 18 Apr. 2017.

Friedman, MA Alonna, “9 Tips for Teaching Kids Responsibility.” 12. Mar.
2013. Web. 18 Apr. 2007.

Howard, Beth. “The Chore Challenge: Teaching Kids Responsibility.” 16
Nov. 2015. 18 Apr. 2017.

Lehman, James. “Stop the Blame Game: How to Teach Your Child to Stop Making
Excuses and Start Taking Responsibility.” Empowering Parents. N.p.,n.d. Web. 18 Apr. 2017.

Stop the Blame Game: How to Teach Your Child to Stop Making Excuses and Start Taking Responsibility

More Handouts for Families:

The trainer’s goal is for participants to not only learn the material, but be able to use it effectively. Below you will find some tips on how to be a successful trainer.
When selecting a staff member to train others to become a trainer themselves, there are a few things that should be taken into consideration:
• Knowledge related to proposed
• Experience in public speaking
• Relatability
• Prior training successes
Since the quality and effectiveness of the training depends on the trainer, it is vital to select a trainer wisely and take all of these things into consideration.

Becoming an effective trainer, especially when preparing to train others to train themselves, is an individual process. Although that process can be unique to each would-be trainer, there are some basic guideline that could help simply this process. Below are some recommendations for becoming an effective and impactful trainer.

Attend trainings. If you are going to train staff—you must have expertise in the subject matter. Be knowledgeable about the subjects you plan to teach. What was effective about the training you took? Incorporate these things into your own sessions and develop your own style! What would you have done differently? Avoid things that were unappealing to you. This will lend the impression that you are a competent and confident trainer. It will also facilitate effective instructional delivery, and will increase your ability to answer questions correctly that the adult learner might pose.
Take the time. The recommended preparation time is three hours for every hour of training.

Be current. Have up-to-date resources and references on the subject(s) you plan to teach.

Use online training courses. There are many free training materials online. Go to “YouTube” and watch video trainings. Here is a short helpful one:

Attend monthly meetings. The Clearinghouse hosts meetings every month. You will pick up pointers and valuable information each time.

Stay informed. Changes occur all the time. Be familiar with new developments. Read all of the E-Presses and the Director Memos.

Stage fright, or fear of public speaking, is a common phenomenon experienced by many. After all, not everyone can confidently and effectively speak in front of others. With this in mind, we have provided some useful tips for the trainer to overcome their stage fright and effectively train others. They are as follows:

Remember, you know the materials. Remind yourself that you are well prepared. Read through the materials, and discuss them with other trainers.

Release the tension. Take deep breaths. Breathe from your diaphragm and remember to exhale all the way. It also helps to exercise regularly.
Rehearse. Practice, practice, practice, until you feel comfortable.
Know the training room and your equipment. Test your audio and visual equipment in advance. Make sure that instructional aides (paper, pens, flip charts, tape, etc.) are on hand and sufficient in number.
Know your audience. Greet and talk with participants as they arrive.
Re-frame. Harness your nervous energy and turn it into enthusiasm.
Use your own style. Be natural and relaxed.
Know your first line and the transition to the main point. Memorizing the introduction can lower anxiety and help you begin with confidence.
Concentrate on the message, not yourself. Focus on what you are there to do. Engage the future trainers in the material, not on you.
Rest up and eat well. Get plenty of rest beforehand and eat well so that you are physically and psychologically alert.
Once a trainer has overcome his or her own impediments to training, they can then focus on how best to train others. Below are some things they must keep in mind in order to put together an effective training:

First time presenting. Choose a subject that can be taught in an hour or less. Present with enthusiasm and dedication! Participants will notice, and so will you.

Condense. Be sure not to overwhelm people with too much information. Never speak for more than 10-15 minutes at a time without a break/activity.

Use your own words. The training will be better received and more interesting for adult learners, and you will be more confident, if you know the important points well enough to be able to express them in your own unique style.

Incorporate experiential learning. Make connections between your own experiences and some of the main points. Make sure to also inquire about the trainee’s experiences. Personalizing information with your own anecdotes will assist in both stressing and expanding points. Use examples from recent cases!

Model and demonstrate. Be sure to provide enough materials so that adult learners can experience age –appropriate curriculum instruction and delivery (e.g., hands-on learning, discovery learning)

Foster discussion. Discussion extends learning and introduces other perspectives. It allows for reciprocity between learner and learner, and learner and trainer. Asking questions can foster discussion.

Listen reflectively. This provides an opportunity to process information introduced by the future trainer. Active listening skills are essential for effective discussion facilitation. It builds understanding and consensus in a group. Active listening skills include: encouraging, paraphrasing, clarifying, reflecting, summarizing, and validating.

Provide consistent feedback. Candid and compassionate feedback can be a powerful stimulus for learning. It addresses the adult learners need for immediate application.

Set the Tone

Another important component of successful training is the ability of the trainer to set the tone for an exciting and engaging learning environment. Below are some tips for setting a positive tone:

Setting the Tone

• Complete setup before participants arrive
• Ensure that the room is comfortable (temperature, ample seating etc.)
• Warmly greet people as they arrive
• Encourage them to make name tags
• Introduce yourself
• Offer food/refreshments
• Orient them to their environment (location of bathroom, vending machines, etc.)
• Provide certificates of training
Breaking the Ice

Ice breakers are short activities that help participants feel energized and more comfortable among each other. They also establish an enthusiastic tone for the training and can help ensure that everyone is actively engaged.

• Smile. As you do introductions, ask each person to share one thing that made them smile that day.

• The Pocket/Purse Game. Everyone selects one or two items from their pocket or purse that has some personal significance to them. They introduce themselves and do a show and tell for the selected item and why it is important to them.

• Story Time Game. The facilitator starts a story with a sentence, and each person follows suit and adds a sentence onto the story-after repeating each sentence that’s already been added.

Workshop Management

Sound management is an integral part of an effective training session. Be sure to establish ground rules at the beginning of the training that establish the way participants interact with you and each other during the training. Doing so can serve as a model for future trainers, and also be useful in defusing or redirecting difficult participants and/or situations.

Sample Rules

• Be a good listener.
• Keep the peace. It is okay to disagree, but not to be disagreeable.
• Respect the opinions of others.
• Consider what others are trying to communicate, ask questions to clarify.
• Be honest and open.
Demonstrate Your Credibility

Perception is key. Make sure that your audience (adult learners) view you as a credible source of information by following these suggestions:

Be honest. If you do not know the answer to a question, don’t make one up. Do some research and get back to them with an answer.
Be unbiased. Make your presentation balanced and as free from bias as possible.
Raise questions about the information. For example, is the information cross-cultural?
Cite authorities that are accepted by your audience, the adult learner.

Following any training session or lecture, and to ensure its efficacy, some form of evaluation should be employed. We suggest distributing evaluation forms to participants. Doing so will help the trainer:
• Determine how participants responded to the training
• Identify areas of strengths/weaknesses of the training
• Gauge whether participants enhanced their job skills
• Gather information to help improve the trainer’s presentation.
Remember to:
• Give participants time to fill out the form
• Collect the form in a manner that allows anonymity to the participants
• Review every form. You can and should learn to be a better trainer over time.
We have attached two sample evaluation forms below which can be used as a guide for trainers to create their own. The forms below may be amended to meet specific program needs.
Sample Training Evaluation Form
Please circle the score that most closely represents your views.

1. To what extent have the objectives of the training been achieved?

2. To what extent have your personal objectives for attending the training been achieved?

3. To what extent has your understanding of the subject improved or increased as a result of the training?

4. To what extent have your skills in the subject of the training improved or increased as a result of the training?

Fully Adequately A little Not at all Not sure
4 3 2 1 0
5. To what extent has the training helped to enhance your appreciation and understanding of your job as a whole?

6. What is your overall rating of this training?

7. To what extent would you recommend others, with similar needs to your own, to attend this training?
Yes No Unsure

Trainer Evaluation

8. Please rate each trainer by circling the relevant score for each:
Trainer 1: _________________________

a) Knowledge of Subject 4 3 2 1 0
b) Organization of sessions 4 3 2 1 0
c) Obvious Preparation 4 3 2 1 0
d) Style and Delivery 4 3 2 1 0
e) Responsiveness to Group 4 3 2 1 0
f) Producing a good learning climate 4 3 2 1 0

Optional Additional Questions: (leave room for free responses)

What did you like most about the training?

How can we improve this training?

Are there any additional topics/issues you think we should add to this training?
1. Which of the following can be considered a barrier to training?

A. high turnover rate
B. staff/managerial resistance
C. stage fright
D. all of the above

2. TRUE or FALSE: Adults approach learning as problem-solving.

3. Which of the following helps to minimize stage fright?

A. taking a power nap before a training
B. know your first line and the transition to the main point.
C. drinking coffee
D. None of the above

4. TRUE or FALSE: Effective training incorporates experiential learning and fosters open discussion.

5. Evaluation of training helps the trainer for all of the following reasons except:

A. Determine participants’ personalities
B. Identify areas of strengths/weaknesses of the training
C. Gauge whether participants enhanced their job skills
D. Gather information to help improve the trainer’s presentation.
6. TRUE or FALSE: Adult learners have long attention spans and are able to retain the majority of information provided in a lecture easily.

Answers: 1. D, 2. True, 3. B, 4. True, 5. A, 6. False

1. Train-the-Trainer Videos: These videos provide helpful tips for presenting/training effectively and engaging your audience.

2. Training the Trainer Resource Pack: The training pack provides helpful tips about getting organized and conducting trainings.

3. Adult Learning: Basic information about adult learning from the Occupational Safety and Health Administration

4. Train the Trainer Manual: This manual provides detailed information about mentoring adult learners, which can be adapted to fit a program’s needs

Andragogy (Malcolm Knowles). (n.d.). Retrieved June 03, 2016, from
Billington, Dorothy D.“Seven Characteristics of Highly Effective Adult Learning Programs.” Ego Development and Adult Education, 1988.
Clapper, T. C. (2010, January). Beyond Knowles: What those conducting simulation need to know about adult learning theory. Clinical Simulation in Nursing, VOL(6), e7-e14. doi:10.1016/j.ecns.2009.07.003
Conner, Marcia L. “How Adults Learn.” Ageless Learner, 1997‐2007.
Learning Pyramid: National Training Laboratories. (n.d.). Retrieved June 03, 2016, from:
Lieb, Stephen “Principles of Adult Learning.” VISION, Fall 1991.‐ 2.htm
Murphy, Jean C., Ed.D., Warner, Carson Carol O. Ed. D., Train-the-Trainer Manual: Mentoring Adult Learners. Chicago State University
Zemke, Ron and Susan “30 Things We Know for Sure About Adult Learning.” Innovation Abstracts,1984.‐3.htm


About Karen Oehme